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Archive for May, 2014

God said to Moses, “I am who I am.

Exodus 3:14

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It took her by surprise–this identity crisis.

One day she knew who she was and the next lacked any sense of a cohesive selfOne day she walked purposefully…with direction; next there was only the feeling of wandering in the dark.  One day her faith blossomed–sharing its fragrance willingly with others; then it suddenly withered to a dingy, lifeless brown hovering somewhere between life and death.

The woman wondered how she would keep moving on when so much of today was caught up in the shattered dreams of the past.  She laughed at the absurdity of looking in the mirror and being unsure of the reflection…like an insecure teenager who hadn’t yet discovered what substance lay beneath the surface.  She wept at the tragedy of losing who she might have become to the early years of abuse.  She even shook her fist at the God who had grieved at the sight of a child’s soul being stripped of hope while her little form was stripped of modesty.  And…the woman missed God the most.

The identity crisis…a personal place of loneliness, trepidation, discovery.  The woman wanders in her spiritual desert–climbing a mountain of doubt and confusion.  She yearns to meet God there and thinks of Moses’.  He had been called by God to lead…to trust…to obey.  Moses’ response?  Who am I?  Moses was experiencing an identity crisis.

“I am who I Am.”  The Lord didn’t address Moses’ insecurities with platitudes or pep talks.  The focus wasn’t on Moses, but on God and what He would accomplish through his servant.  And the woman realizes that those are the words of truth to which she must cling.  “I am who I Am.”  And she keeps climbing.

http://www.bing.com/videos/search?q=youtube+christian+songs+i+am&FORM=VIRE5#view=detail&mid=38AAD37AE046FD4DEED638AAD37AE046FD4DEED6

 

 

 

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eaglefly

The moment I heard the words filter through the radio of our crumb-sprinkled family car, my heart responded with a question?  Am I that woman?  The message resounded and I’ve been considering it for more than a week–long enough for me to admit that this is one of my day-by-day, moment-by-moment struggles.  It may be yours, too.

What is this self-imposed, self-focused, self-degrading habit we battle each day?  Perfectionism.

It afflicts co-workers, Bible study leaders, young mothers, old mothers, neighbors, and friends.  Always striving…she is the woman never quite satisfied with self.  And deep in her empty places she has somehow mistaken the desire for acceptance…approval…love for a twisted version of if-then. 

If I can just lose five more pounds then he’ll respect me.

If I earn this degree then I’ll finally believe I’m smart.

If I keep my house clean enough then I’ll know I’m a good housewife.

If  my children are at the top of their class then I can trust myself as a mother.

If I join one more church committee then God will know I’m a committed Christian.

 

But all of the if’s just end up as not enough.  There is always another goal…something else to prove…a feeling of not quite meeting the mark.

Why?  Because we’ve forgotten the mercy of His love, acceptance, and approval.   With Christ, there is an abundance of all our heart seeks.   The one who is Perfection has released us from the need to prove our goodness or worth.

We can stop striving, dear Friend.  Just belonging to Perfection is enough.

 

Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ.  (Col. 3:23-24)

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