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Posts Tagged ‘being known’

give yourself permission to allow the beauty of self to shine through (4)

I was such a people pleaser and in trying to be everything to everyone else, I have little idea of who I am.

 Her words, full of regret and confusion, describe me only a few years ago. At times—even after years of seeking wise counsel and prayer—I still struggle with desiring approval.

If you’ve ever felt the pull to be someone you weren’t designed to be; ever buried your thoughts beneath the false assumption that your feelings are inconsequential…irrelevant…immaterial; ever heard yes spill from your mouth when you intended to say no; then you understand.

It was only in beginning to understand authentic, unconditional love that I found release from the terrible, demanding tyrant of seeking always to please others at the cost of genuine personhood.

The ingrained habits of childhood followed me into marriage and, as a newlywed, I “protected” myself from being fully known by remaining meek and agreeable whether or not I agreed with my husband.

The dusty blue and white striped couch is a perfect example.

As my husband and I meandered around the Sears furniture department, we compared several different chairs, couches, and kitchen tables. Pointing out a particular set sofa within our price range, Dave asked for my opinion. I like it. Which…I did, but I preferred a different piece. The traditional one a few steps to the right. I remained silent.

I chose pleasing my husband to sharing myself and was reminded of it each day for the five years that cute little sofa graced our home.

Time has taught me that to be truly loved by others, I must be known as I am—not as others might wish me to be. Not as I imagine I should be. Just the woman God created me to be.

If people pleasing has been your struggle, would you give yourself permission to allow the beauty of self to shine through in your thoughts and actions? Allow Him to reveal the woman He designed you to be—fully known and loved.

Blessings,

Tammy

 

P.S. I always share my opinion when buying sofas now and my husband still loves me. J

 

Ideas that might help as you discover You-

If you, like my friend, feel uncertain about who you are, consider starting small.

  1. Decide on an untried genre of book that sounds interesting or explore a hobby that intrigues you.
  2. Read and memorize scripture that combats doubt about self by affirming your identity in Christ. These are some of my favorites: 1 Thessalonians. 1:4, Psalm 139:14, Ephesians. 1:5
  3. Journal your thoughts, feelings, and discoveries.
  4. Ask a friend, spouse, or mentor to pray for your specific needs as the Lord guides you toward a greater understanding of your identity.

Linking up with:

Kelly-Balarie-23testimonytuesday200x200_zps25c8f37cPatriciaHolbrook_RW_button3A-e1485727161169Holley-Gerth-Button-250x250

 

 

 

 

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Let's fight the good fight • www.breastcancer.com (1)He declared it good. The golden brightness pouring across the horizon like honey flowing from a hive. The ocean dancing and crashing against land in celebration. Elegant birds arching and bowing at the ebb and flow of air currents across their missile-shaped bodies.

Then, the man. Beautiful. Innocent. A one-of-a-kind creation fashioned by the hand of God.

But, God designed man for something more than a sunrise to greet him each morning or admiration for his surroundings. Just as the Image Bearer–Father, Son, and Spirit–exist in relationship, God made man for relationship.

It is not good for man to be alone. (Genesis 2:18)

And the One who gives good gifts presented the first man with a woman–to come alongside as a companion.

We are all made for relationship, Friends. It is not good for us to be alone. Separated from others. Lacking intimate, soul-bearing, heart-refreshing relationship.

Being truly known can feel risky. It requires vulnerability and we wonder if we’ll be accepted for the faulty, flawed women we are. This is the unknown of any human relationship, but if we–the Church–love others as He expects then relationship builds its foundation on the Truth.

And in Truth? There is room for grace…love…forgiveness. There is space to be fully Self and fully accepted. Let’s trust each other enough to step away from loneliness and into love.

Lord, help us to admit we need other people and give us the capacity to love others the way you have loved us. Amen

Linking up today with Patricia Holbrook at Recharge Wednesday.

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